Impact Starts with People.

When I was in DC this past weekend for the March for Life, my friend, Bernadette was teasing me about how much I love talking to strangers. Whether I hear them discussing philosophy on the metro and I join in, or I tell a girl passing how cute her coat is, or stop to offer a homeless man the extra sandwhiches I made... I don't always play by appropriate social boundaries. I did though realize that I am much more comfortable doing so when I know that I am in common company... sure I joined in a philosophy discussion, but it was with a group of people wearing Pro-Life shirts, I knew we were on the same 'team'. I may have told that girl how cute her coat was, but she was also walking with a group of nuns... I figured no one would respond harshly surrounded by nuns! And so on... so I decided that I really wanted to break out of my comfort zone by not playing by appropriate social boundaries with people who made me... well, uncomfortable!

Day One:
I took extra food to a men's homeless shelter that I often donate surplus food to. Usually I only speak to the couple of men who run the shelter... white, well-dressed, familiar and comfortable. I chat and laugh with them but have always avoided the men who actually stay at the shelter. I always claim, "It's for my safety! I'm just being smart!" But as I got to think about it... I am often so frustrated by the problems in our world and recognize that they come about because we fail to treat each other as persons, we never really see one another. So if I would just smile, make eye contact and some small talk... maybe I could have some impact. And so I did and I could tell that so many of the men really appreciated a smile, appreciated being seen not as a homeless person, but simply as a person. I hold on to that part of the experience, because there also was the man who thought that a friendly smile and donated food were a green light to speak disgusting things to me and grab me. It was a reminder that we all have a long way to go to really see each other as persons not objects, not problems... people.

Day Two:
I participated in the trash collecting and really was surprised at how little I gathered. Granted I didn't take it to the extremes and put in toilet paper and leftover food (Though... I really should have!) I definitely related to Erin's desire to generate more trash to maximize the impact, it just felt like so little! Although I suppose had we invited the whole campus to participate we would have been shocked to see how much trash is generated on one college campus, in one city, in one state, in one country... multiply that by the whole world and the amount of trash we alone generated could have had an impact.

Day Three:
I run around most days barely engaging in small talk because my life is soooo busy. But today I decided to stop and take time to talk with a couple of acquaintances. This definitely took me out of my comfort zone because I really only want to engage in deep conversation with people who I am more than mere acquaintances with. But this risk paid off, we got to talking about some of the problems we have on ODU's campus, specifically the lack of any type of true community. We discussed for almost two hours better ways to build community and a sense of identity at ODU. It was a fantastic discussion and I left inspired to continue building better relationships with people, even when my life seems just too busy. The idea that we continually impact one another every moment was driven home after this conversation!

Day Four:
Today I really decided to push appropriate social boundaries. I smiled and said hello to everyone. That is really hard... especially when you can tell people are in a bad mood or are uncomfortable and really want you to look away. But I kept catching people's eyes, smiling and saying a quick hello. I also tried to say whatever I was thinking (adhering to Thumper's adage of course... "If you can't say something nice... don't say nothing at all"!) so if I wanted to know what someone was listening to on their iPod I asked! If I had read the book they were holding, I talked about it. I complimented pretty much everyone wearing purple (it's my favorite color and so freaking pretty!) The hardest was when I was in line, once outside ODU's business office, once in Hamilton and once at the Post Office. People get really uncomfortable when you talk to them in line, probably because they can't get away! But I kept talking... I just really want people to start seeing other people... like really truly seeing them. And if that takes me talking to people I'm uncomfortable with and letting them see me as a person, that I might see them as a person... I'll keep doing it!